My journey with Amy, taught me a few things.

In the general scheme of things, I reckon I am just an ordinary kind of bloke, a get the job done, kind of person, who is mostly reliable and authentic.

There have been times however when I have felt fairly obscure and of no great value to anyone or anything. I think I wouldn't be alone in this, even if most would not want to admit it. But to be unrecognised, unknown and even inconspicuous, may for some, just be too much to bare, especially for  those who desire fame or status, who might be on that journey.

I will also confess there have also been times when I have felt like I have something to offer and have some level of significance or value to the organisation I minister within.

Who is it that determines whether you are obscure ? or whether you are significant ?

It got me thinking, why do we search for significance ? Why do we want to be noticed ? Why do we need others to recognise us ? What are we trying to achieve ?

  

One of the key things I have learned  whilst on my journey with Amy (see my last blog entry) is that life is temporary at best, and fragile, very very fragile.  Here today and gone tomorrow. So why do we fuss about over silly insignificant matters or trying to out-do someone else ?

I doubt that many of us want to be unknown, or forgotten, or even neglected or abandoned, but what if by being obscure we actually were significant ?

I read this quote today and it's really good:

  

                               "Whatever your past has been, your future is still spotless ".  

I don't know who quoted it, but I kind of like to think it might be a Christian quote, you can forget about everything you have ever done, the future is still being written and it presently is as pure as snow and it can stay that way by the choices we each make along the way.

As I sat with Amy and her family over these past weeks, my life gained some healthy perspective.

Love, deep love...

Care, deep care...

Helplessness..

Hope...

and even sorrow.                                                  All of these things bring influence upon one another.

My future is still being written, I am not finished yet, I have work still to do... I have made some shocking choices in my life that I cannot go back and erase from my history.  They are now there,  and in some cases have caused great hurt to not only myself but to others close to me... I cant change that, and you cant change it about yourself either.

But we can take another shot.  we can start over, we can change the trajectory of our life journey by doing something that the bible says, about  " transforming our mind " ... take a read of the verse as it comes from Romans...

Transformation, - being made like Christ in our thoughts and actions and preparing ourselves in readiness for the day when we will meet Jesus face to face.

For those who have already gone before us, thay dont suffer like we who are left behind suffer... with our hurt and pain and feelings of loss, 

NO..they dance, they sing and they are in a far better place than us, a significant place.,

with a significant God who is not obscure in any way shape or form.

we may not understand why things happen the way they do, and I am one of the first to admit that  I have some questions for God about some of the stuff that happens here on earth...

But in the mean time, I am praying that in my personal search for significance, that I may find it in Him completely, even if it means me being obscure on the earth.

the words of John are still true:

He must become greater, I must become less.

(John 3:30)