ICO 1

This is the first of a few blog entries I may make recording my time at ICO: There wont be any set order or day of blogging, just when I feel led to. ( this may end up being the only entry )

I know there are a few curious people about my facebook status entry last night..

so here it is: ( just to embarrass myself some more) -

we had a great meal with the Zonal commissioners and the Chief of Staff, were now in a meeting in the Chapel, we had our introductions of who we were and where we came from... done some worshipping, and praying and the Chief of the Staff ( No 2 Salvo leader in the world) is up and preaching. I am sitting second row, and start to feel nausea and clammy and feel I am about to ether chuck on the floor, or faint on the floor, either of which would be most unsatisfactory.... the room is stuffy, we are all in full blues, its cold outside but really hot inside and I am gone, so I just have to get out of the room ...meaning I need to excuse myself in front of the Chief, while he is preaching in front of the whole group(50 people)so out I go, disrupting the whole group, and missing out on the opening sermon, message... for our group, so annoyed, so frustrated and embarrassed as well as feeling a little ripped off.

So Yep...thats what happened....

I awoke today, feeling ok, a little headache, but I want the best out of this experience.. for me, I need it.. I need to be spiritually replenished and renewed and refreshed, I want that for my life.

so the blog today is all about humility and the way in which God is leading me, personally... its deeply personal. I am being helped by the book " The Resilient Life " ( G. McDonald) here are some thoughts about what resilient people look like:

  • They prepare themselves for the "emergencies" of life.
  • They know exactly what has to be accomplished.
  • They keep themselves physically fit.
  • They grow their minds.
  • They harness their emotions.
  • They trim their egos.
  • They open their hearts to the presence of God.

I have a huge long way to go, But again today I ask God to do in me, what only He can do... I fear at times that I may never make it... for the distance I still have to travel is so far and so great. My one hope, and the last straw I clutch on to, is that My God is faithful and long sufferring, that He is merciful and full of grace and that He loves me with such love that I can never fully comprehend or understand, that even though I am a sinner, He wont let me go ever.

and as for the list above, well...my personal goal is to start doing these things, to allow God to do in me, what only He can do, to shape me, I am not the best perfect leader that ever walked the planet, I know it...

I also know my weakness and failures...

But today I choose to get back up, and see what God wants to say to me today and do in me today.

so as we approach our second full day here, I am open ...my heart is open, my ears are open, my eyes are open, my spirit is open..

and hopefuly my flesh wont faint in the process today...

YEP....I am weak, but He is strong.

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